As we have stated previously everyone develops some dis-empowering beliefs growing up, it's unavoidable. We all carry a certain amount of Early Narcissism around with us. It's when these dis-empowering beliefs, start being formed around core values, that EN turns into Narcissistic Personality Disorder, NPD. The top five general core values are Integrity, Accountability, Diligence, Perseverance and Discipline. The top ten personal core values are Fulfillment, Inspiration, Contribution, Health, Family, Love, Creativity and Success.
Lets for argument sake, just take one core value, integrity. When we look at the definition of integrity, according to Wikipedia, it’s defined as a “concept of consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations, and outcomes. In ethics, integrity is regarded as honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one’s actions.”
Let me call out the key words in this definition that are often used, consistency, and honesty. Consistency is about being the same regardless of the situation. It's about actions and outcomes. A person with NPD is very consistent with their dis-empowering beliefs, they are master manipulators, and in that, always very consistent. But if you look at honesty, we immediately see where this can be a very big problem for this individual.
Honesty or accuracy of one’s actions requires intention and thought. How honest or accurate are your behaviors, actions, and words. If you have the belief, that people lie to get what they want, you will have no integrity from an ethical viewpoint. Integrity stems from the Latin word ‘integer’ which means whole and complete. So integrity requires an inner sense of ‘wholeness’ and consistency of character. When you have integrity, people should be able to visibly see it through your actions, words, decisions, methods, and outcomes. When you are ‘whole’ and consistent, there is only one you. You bring that same you, wherever you are, regardless of the circumstance. You don’t leave parts of yourself behind. You don’t have a ‘work you,’ a ‘family you,’ and a ‘social you.’ You are YOU all the time. But a person with NPD, who believes it's OK to lie to get what you want, will be a chameleon, depending on the setting or situation. A person who lies to get what they want, is 100% without integrity, all the time. This one dis-empowering belief is Hugh and can be devastating. Since he believes in lying, the Habitual Mind, in cooperation with the Neutral Universe, will constantly bring opportunities, where this individual will be compelled to lie. This belief alone is enough to cause sever anxiety, fear and self loathing.
Unfortunately a person with NPD, usually has more then one dis-empowering belief. If you add the beliefs that I'm not good enough or smart enough or deserving enough into the mix , it's easy to see how this individual would be constantly irritable and discontent. They might not even realize they feel this way, thinking that everyone must feel like this, until accidentally discovering Alcohol or they might actively seek Alcohol. Once they start self medicating, to get a little relief from these feelings, the die is cast. It's only a question of time.