Although many would disagree with me I believe anything can be cured. I am a fan of Louise Hay’s book “You Can Heal Your Life” where she talks about how incurable means “to cure from within.” This means that when a doctor says something is incurable that means the doctors don’t have a medicine or treatment for it that is proven to work. However it doesn’t mean that the patient himself can’t find a cure from his own inner resources.
Every day people are proving the modern medicine wrong in their belief that something cannot be cured. People are curing themselves of cancer, heart disease and diabetes on a daily basis. People are being cured of mental diseases, personality disorders and just about everything there is a name for.
If someone can be cured of MPD, than one can certainly be cured of NPD or Narcissistic Personality Disorder. However the individual with NPD has to want to change.
He has to have hit some point in his life where the pain of staying the same outweighs the fear of change or in this case the fear of facing the truth. He has to hit bottom. In many opinions 12-Step Programs offer a long term solution, to a seemingly incurable case of obsession of the mind, or of being trapped in "the bondage of self".
The problem we have here is that most people seeking the change are the victims of narcissistic abuse, not the narcissist’s themselves. The victims if they haven't been totally demoralized and browbeaten into submission may entertain fantasies of approaching the narcissist and saying “honey, I think you might have a problem, or you may have narcissistic personality disorder, and I need you to get some help for this little problem.
The fantasy is that the narcissist will say “yes, honey, you are absolutely right, I’ve always felt something was deeply wrong with me and I want to change. I will schedule an appointment with the therapist this week.”
HA! Not likely, although I’m sure some readers have heard a similar story in the narcissist’s attempt to gain control of the relationship. Narcissists are habitual liars and will say anything to deflect the attention back to you. They are master manipulators, especially with family members.
The more likely reaction will be the wrath of narcissistic rage being unleashed upon you. You have just threatened his security, which is the illusion he lives in. You are likely to be the subject of attack on just why it is that YOU are the one with the problem and he will deliver his wrath in such a way you begin to believe it. This attack is totally unconscious and has become an integral part of the Narcissist's personality. If not arrested the individual slips into the final stage of the disease, Malignant Narcissist Personality Disorder. Since 1985 this has been classified as a Stage 2 Mental Illness and is considered an incurable condition at this time.